again

Bismillahirrahmaaanirrahiim..
Life's good here. Everyday I try to find something new and something different. It was hard for me before. I've passed moments in my life; moments where I can realize what this life is and what I am here for. I lose of my self. I ever feel that feeling just once. I've never been feeling that samething until now. I used to lie by myself. I lie to everything that He showed me. I couldn't be iklas and strong at that time althoughh I always smile-laugh, but actually there is alot of weakness on me. My heart is not strongger enough to accept worth thing. I try to figure it up, I but it is still a dream for me.
I feel too bad when I remember my mistakes-many mistakes. I've hurt manypeople, I am very sorry. There's something uncontrolled of me, I'd lied. I am sorry...